Surviving Afghanistan with Harry

Good grief! How did I survive a year in Afghanistan?

When I first arrived, all the lifer contractors talked about how great KBR was. The living conditions, space, running water and real bathrooms, Barbecues and days off, Vacation time taken every 4 months.  And beer, beer, beer.

I don't work there nor did I get the royal treatment.  Looking back on the year, I'm so thankful to have it done.  It's a real accomplishment.  I'm on a fairly large base and the Prince is just around the corner.  I see a bathroom twice a day that is approximately a block walk from my bed - can't say room since I'm in a dorm with 5 others. Just try to make it there in a timely fashion in the middle of a cold night...you women with children know what I mean.  For the men, I'm told that it's equivalent to the morning after a beer bash.  I just bet Harry has his own golden facility.

They say that he lives like the commoners - I think not.  For example; other that the visual of him stumbling to the pisser in the middle of the night, I can't imagine him eating grub on Asia night...take your pick of chicken, vegetable or beef curry dishes (complete with the bones), slavered over rice or noodles and some kind of fish stew.  Take a deep breath...fishy odor and curry - please gag me.  Although if you can stand the smell, (and I hope you can because it seeps into your clothes and lingers all the way to the laundry), the dishes are outstanding!  And to top it off, there is some really sweet yummy rice pudding!

Do you think the Crown Jewel has a bed like mine?  I have to be careful to plant myself exactly for sleep, because one turn will land me on the hard concrete floor.  I could not imagine what went on in that mattress prior to my arrival.  One side is smashed down and the other is elevated - making it an unwelcomed slide...and off I go.  I actually had my 3" comfort mattress pad sent here, that also slips to the floor.

Just last night, I made a midnight dash to the ladies, carefully positioning myself back into bed chattering my teeth all the way, with a fluffy fake warm mink cover, when I felt a tinkle on my backside...then waist...I chased the bugger into my bra only to pull out a Camel Spider.  Well it's dead now.  Good riddance. I did it...me!  The one who called my husband home from work to kill a spider 30 years ago.  Take that!   I bet ol' Harry doesn't do that and I'm hoping he doesn't wear a bra along with his other escapades!

But he is famous and known the world over as the rabble rouser Prince of England and he's here fighting the good fight.  The taliban didn't chase him off even when they attacked the base special for him.  He stayed and fought.  I bet we shared the initial fear from the attack and then the outrage at their effort.  There are things that are meant to be shared and he lives and dies like the rest of us.  God Save the Queen...or in this case Harry.

                                               

"They"

Sand storm!!! One of the younger guys came in with the alert. We then rush to use the bathrooms and those that partake of nicotine go for the last smoke before the storm. It hits like tiny grandules that clean your face to a ooohh so soft smoothness but leaves it red and filthy. And the sand gets in the smallest openings, (imagine beaches). We'll also be cleaning the clinic for days. And please protect your eyes, warnings- which won't help. I'll still get eye injuries for days even with that.

I actually got a patient with a bug bite today. I have no idea what kind, but the area was blistery, red, swollen and spreading rapidly. Everything can kill you here. I'll have to see him daily until I leave...too bad not to see how it resolves- if it does.

An exPat came in today without his immunization record. A big no-no here. If you don't have one, you get shot up all over again. We're used to seeing the FN's do this. (FN's= INdians, Kenyans, basically all others outside the US). Their excuse is "somebody" took it. Or my personal favorite..."THEY didn't give me one." First lets establish who "THEY" are and go from there. It floors me that people from third world countries will let anybody do anything to them without question. No wonder why they're so easily run over.

 My thought...Do you not question what "THEY" put into your body? Why would you leave behind the one thing that proves you had 7 injections? They're done in series too. So month #1 you get 7 shots, then month #2 you get 3 and so on. They add shots all of the time- it a big company money maker. SO, no shot record gets you the whole series all over again. We had Anthrax added a little ways back. No other vaccination has caused such an uproar. So, I thought to lead as a good example and I took the shot first. Who could refuse if the medic was the first to comply- right? One hour later the Anthrax vaccine was cancelled throughout all camps! "They" could not have planned it better...

Speaking of things that make me go hum...My female buddy from back home is on a base with 2/3's ANA soldiers. I don't know what brainiac thought up that to place her there. We're in the process of withdrawal and as that happens the US troops leave and the people that they've trained (ANA) take their place to protect their own country. One big problem is "they" are also the "green" that you may have heard about on tv...green on blue shootings. I was so surprised that I was not conveniently placed there as should be obvious to anyone reading my blog. "They" (in the big house) have tried so many times to get rid of me through insurgent means so many time that I've lost count. Course my buddy and I are both from Detroit - hmm?

I start the sign out process soon. Just 6 short days and I will be home.  I am so anxious to be gone.  I look around suspiciously for any way that I can be got from "they."  No need to worry about the taliban when you have conspirators breathing down your back.  I simply hold my breath until the plane takes off. And, I'll hold on to my Lord with faith that I will make it home safely.  See you soon!