Ark builders please apply 11/28/11 (late post)

We had our first official flood warning this weekend and what a bust! They had sand bags stacked and ditches dug. KBR (competitor company), is digging the ditches without a place to drain, so it's really a moat. I guess that's fair play since they lost the medical...most of the contracts here. I don't get it. They were suppose to be the bomb, absolute best company to work for. They are the construction team, their roads are pristine while ours and the others have huge craters and ruts that even the barricades have fallen in. hilarious!  We were tripping all over the place. Some more than others. I officially whooped my legs into the air and landed on my arse right after a shower, and I was the only one with a flashlight and it hadn't even started raining. Go figure.

The rainy season here starts about now and rumor has it that it can get pretty ugly. The water supposedly gets high enough to need waders for a month or two. Well, it flooded a few weeks back and many people lost everything. They got about 2-3 feet of water, so naturally people freak at the slightest cloud. The official warning went something like this... extreme rain and flooding expected this weekend. Get your gear in plastic bags and store high... Good idea, but where do they suppose we store things? There is a very limited amount of space afford to each individual. I actually have more room in my closet at home and here I have to share that space with my bed. So that's where I'm storing my rainy day snacks so do not have to trek to the chow hall for meals in the sludge. It did downpour a couple of times, but by the time I ran out it had all evaporated. It did get incredibly muddy and slippery at times. I trust it will come and I will be unprepared because there is no way to prepare for Afghanistan.

I did go to the nearest PX for rain boots - HA! Ha! I'm so funny! Of course they were out! They clean out of most things quickly. It's the size of Sam's Club, but it's the only store. Can we all say monopoly... well, it's their game and I'm just a contractor. I fortunately am toting my all season coat and it's better than nothing. Not that I'm complaining. Some of the FN's have their coats with garbage bags over them. Not that it's a bad idea, but I don't really see how that helps. Go ahead and wear a garbage bag for a minute. You heat up inside of there and sure enough the moisture gets in and quickly everything is wet inside too, but now you're just a sticky mess. Or maybe it's a sneaky plan used to smother the nearest towel head Taliban.

 It's late and I'm always goofy when it's late. So instead of writing letters to the President and my congressman...does anyone remember the Calderon episode when I thought it would be funny to send an email to the President of Mexico.. forget it ..long story, and apparently I was the only one amused and have agreed never to write him again...I safely write in my blog.

Thank God I'm writing this blog so in years to come when I'm bitching about rain, I can look back and be thankful for what I have!

Life at the Big House 11/29/11

Being a women in a male dominated society- I had heard all of these horror stories; rape, mutilation, hate crimes against us women contractors.... what a crock. It's not happening here. Or I might be on the precipice of old lady... The horror!
I was the Queen of never leave the house without your lipstick. Also, did I not have the best cleavage in town with the highest heels...well, I showed it the most anyway. It's sort of a relief not to primp anymore. I tried when I got here...no wait... it didn't even last through Dubai with all of the heat and talcum/sand. Well,  I love it that everyone likes me for who I am.

I have a huge benefit with my age. 1st, no one ever guesses. 2nd, the younger girls and guys just love telling me of their exploits. My own kids don't even do that. It's really fun to listen to them. 3, I can eat dessert! I lost a butt, but now I think I'm ready to take it back- Ha! I never thought I'd see this day, but I say embrace it!

Speaking of sweets, there is no Starbucks or McDonald's here. There is a coffee place called Green Beans- how ever did they get that name? It's run by Nepalese people that make their addition of coffee that you must acquire a taste for. It's something like stale and burnt all at once. YUK! It doesn't even taste as good as the real green beans in the DFAC. (hum, maybe they brew those) So I search out the USO contributors for the armed forces at most MWR's (entertainment centers with free internet, phones and TV's set to the latest sports), where they have flavor add ins, real cream and great coffee. Being a coffee junkie, I supply the creamer at the office or I don't get it. I had thought that I was the only one that drank coffee with creamer until I started buying it and like wa-laa, it's gone!

The one benefit that I don't get- no one gets, is the latrine called the green rocket. It's a nasty port-a potty that 500 people have been using for the past 3 days because our water has been turned off. I don't know if this was in anticipation of the flood or what. But I know there is water somewhere. It's horrible and I can not believe how fast it has filled up. The boys (and I say that loosely), have made it game to fill it up with their most disgusting waste...in a pile...so now you can gag from the visual that I've had to endure- so gross! I did finally get to experience the bottled water showers. One time would've done it...but no!!!! The Canadians left the country- hurray, because that means that we can sneak over to their deserted compound and use the showers- just a block away versus the mile walk as before. Their water is shut off too, but it beats pouring bottled water over yourself in the cold Afghan morn.

The Canadians really did pack up and take off. They're not much for stamina anyway...so go. They packed up everything. It's funny to see just rows upon rows of cement slabs where their bunks were. They left the shower conex , (it looks like the metal box on the back of a semi truck),  and they left the most fabulous wood covered deck, like 20 x 30. I took my supervisor past it and wondered aloud how we could transfer it the 4 blocks to our site. It would be great for our hang out area...geez, we have 3 broken desk chairs a very dirty bench that no one will sit on that holds our ashtray and 2 school room desks for 4 people that were made for elementary kids and the seats don't even swivel. Not that I'm complaining. I'll always have fond memories of that area right outside of our clinic.

My conex is a tiny 10 x 6 room that houses 4 women in two bunkbeds. It stinks because it's also where we store our dirty laundry and it is also downwind of the dreaded poo pond. The top bunks were made especially for basketball players with no rails to help you out. I had a top bunk for two nights and I made one of the girls push me up because my feet wouldn't reach so that I could push myself up. Hilarious! One of the girls got a up for a midnight jaunt to the latrine and hung herself by her dogtags. Thank God they broke. 

So that's life at KAF. Although there's much to do here and it's a big place, it is starting to feel like my own. 

Breaking barriers Blog, I got another one in-yeah!

One of my favorite friends here is from Pakistan. I'm a blurb-er- who would've guessed?? I so rudely said that I would've have guessed because he's so nice. He replied that my views were shaped by the media. Well, what am I to think when that's where Bin Laden was found? But my buddy Shumail or Shumie is incredible and peaceful and kind. He vacations in China and has invited me to visit his home if I should ever get to Islamabad. He tells me of his home and his family- really, only Americans share details. This is an honor and reserved for close friends. The rest of the world think we are nosey.

Speaking of, the other day I was walking out of the DFAC (chow hall), and one of the (Afghan) tray collectors said to me- Hello! How are you ma'am? OK- usually I wince with the ma'am thing...and I have been successful to not reply- piss off...but, I was unbelievably shocked! The rest of the world, or the non-Americans think that the our greetings as "how are you" are nosey and unacceptable. We do it without thinking- OK, so hence...But the dude had the biggest smile and I had to reply, "Hello back and how are you today?" He was so pleased with his reply, "Very well thank you."

Today, I have to share with you a story of an American soldier who came to KAF base to stay at the Wounded Soldier's Hospital. Now picture an eating hall where hundreds of people are in various forms of eating. Now see the wounded soldier with his bilateral crutches trying to limp to a table with his tray in the mists of harried diners. Unbelief to me that no one stopped what they were doing to help him. Yes...of course I did. And he did not want the help, but too bad. So, I went and got him drinks and dessert too! Thank every soldier that you see for their service that provides our freedom and maybe one day soon you too may be able to serve them in return.

Next, I've hung out with Bosnians. Croatians, Macedonians, Italians, only Brits speak of their home (maybe to make us jealous that we broke away?). None speak of their family's and it's culturally rude to say for example, " How's your family?" so, a few days ago one of the guys was very homesick and seeing me sitting alone on the smoking bench, always available for conversation, started off telling me about his 4 month old son and his 3 yr old son. The sacrifice of his being away broke my heart. Then he told me of South Lake in Bosnia and the beauty of the country. Another ran up to me later to tell me that so & so's Mom died 4 days ago and he had just gotten word of it. Americans have the Red Cross for such emergencies. I went to talk to the grief ridden person to offer comfort and to help get him home. We are so privileged that it never occurred to me that everyone doesn't have such resources.

Another time, I went for my morning smoke, ( Geeezzz, is that all I do is smoke? It's funny that I didn't start up again until I got here). An Indian guy who I knew a little and likes to practice his English on me struck up a conversation. Most Indians will not speak English, but can read it. He was telling me of the politics and conflict between India and China, (I had no idea...Americans have enough to deal with...OK I'm a little ignorant). China is also in a border dispute with Pakistan- WOW! Does China like anyone? The story goes that China is losing the war due to the Indian Gods who are helping the Indians fight. The Chinese never see the bullets coming and are getting smashed! He is very convincing in his story, but I am thrilled that he's going through the trouble of explaining everything to me and in English.

And lastly, the girls from the UK who were a blast! We drank near beer and with them it felt like the real thing. They spoke of their lives, and the pubs, and their jobs, and the pubs, and their boyfriends, and the pubs, and the pubs and the pubs. They were always laughing and they had just got stuck in camp for a week, but it felt like a lifetime. I was very sorry to see them leave.

OK, one more...One black American man walked up to me, in front of the co-worker that said I was too friendly, and said to me, "You are so nice. You'd walk a mile to put a smile on a sad face and I really appreciate that so far from home." Am I tooting my own horn? Not really. I have a great gift from the Lord and I will not throw it away no matter who cuts me down.

So, that's all I have for today. Miss ya all!

Can't we all get along? 11/26/11

        I really appreciate the thought of some of you sending me gifts, especially the Parkas- but, I do have yet have a home base and I won't get anything for months if sent. Thanks for the thought. It is very appreciated.
Memories are what occupies everyone's mind today. We have just been though Thanksgiving and thoughts of our family's and friends ... One old fart put on heavy metal music today, hoping that the coolness of it would fertilize his balding head and remove the paunch of his gut as it rolls over his belt. No, I don't like this fellow...read on. Old times, past times to remember and reflect. But across the street...
The servicemen- these days are the things of memories. "Thank you for serving: is my greeting to them all. There's a definite distinction between them and us contractors. Except with me. How fortunate I am!
Today, I went to lunch with the rest of my office, 5 of us in all. As every Mom knows when kids are in a group, no matter how big or small they must be in an even number because somebody will get left out. Today was my day. Unfortunately it's happened many times this week- wah, wah! Another story, another day. I have spent many meals this week with other friends due to the viciousness of one person. Today I was invited to accompany the work crew and then they sat at a table for four. I could have pulled a chair over and been in the in the way- inconveniencing everyone else. It was like it was planned . You just don't sit 5 at this table. I thought of being mean and doing it anyway, but I was being intentionally left out and it really hurt my feelings. (Visual here)...Most people dress in dull desert colors with the exception of us- medical. We stick out like a sore thumb or a supreme target for the Taliban in our bright ocean deep blue shirts that also come in fire engine red! So, there I am, pushed away, odd kid out and slowly I scan the room for a friend. I can do this. I'm better than them- sniff. I have lots of friends. I walk tentatively towards some Bosnians that do not speak English well but will be most welcoming, guaranteed! A soldier at the same table who I knew not at all was looking at my shame and whispering to his buddy's and as I approached, they stood and asked me to join them for lunch. My eyes teared up. It was great conversation and they knew me from saying hi and my thank yous to them - which they thought was kind. It was me who was very grateful. After lunch, the Bosnian guys were walking with us and people came up to me talking about the snub, and how wrong...blah, blah. It was big gossip that day. and when I was asked about it, I just said, there was no problem. I was just having lunch with my friends!                                       

It's messed up here - blog with a picture of the Poo Pond at sunset 11/25/11

Afghanistan weather is weird. It beats Michigan weather hands down. You wake to winter and it's freezing, and you spend the day till 3 pm peeling layers off until the high of 80 or somewhere around that. Then you're ready for a nice dip in a pool that's located in dreamland, because the only water around here is bottled. This is the very reason that I had to bring a little of every season in clothing. When I go to bed the tent is still hot and stuffy from the day, so someone has the air conditioning on. My big news was I finally got passed the remote control to the heater and air conditioner units. YEAH! Only the highest in seniority get to hold it and while I moved from FOB to FOB, I still had the highest seniority, once I returned back to Shangri La. I asked to move to the tent with all of my friends only to have all of the bitches...oops, my friends move to their own assigned private rooms. And they left me with the TCN's, (third country nationals) who don't or won't speak English. The temperature control units are located near the ceiling and only an amazon could reach it with a ladder, then they need to know how to work it. Mere mortals have no power to reach it, hence the remote. And I have it! YEAH! In Kenya, it must be 200 degrees year round because those little girls are freezing all of the time. They walk around with their 70's coats: warm, short, furry collars... ala Pat Benatar. I can be comfortable or I can be nice because I'm totally surrounded by Kenyans as my UK buddies have gone home as well. Then my good buddy in billeting (room assignments) had some mercy on me and gave me my own room too. Very big no, no for a passer by as me. Short are my success'.
The class system for every particular country is very visible here.. Top dogs are in top positions and the lowest do very low jobs: sort garbage, do laundry, pot washers, clean toilets. Jobs for which somebody has to do and I'm very grateful and always thank them for their duty to their task.
It's also amazing that everyone has to be able to read and write English to work here, but the lowly masses can't speak it. This is suppose to change this year if they want to keep their jobs, Amazing! It's more weeding of the haves and don't want. You'd think the hiring process would have identified these things that could get in the way. I have no problem with them. I just write it down and have them read. It works out just fine. Another thing is who do you think will do these crappy jobs for peanuts- not Americans. I was thinking of jumping ship and was offered a job doing something totally different. They told me the pay and I swore it was too low per year...so, No Thank You...Then the guy said, No, It's per month. I'm sending my resume tonight! Pray for me! The job is only available to Americans. I don't know what to say- WTH or thank you God or both. What a world that we live in.                       

Thankful 11/24/11

Today I made the Happy Thanksgiving call to the family. I cried and got a little homesick- something that never happens here because they keep me pretty busy and even down times is just another minute blending into the last. So my call went something like this...hold on, we're taking group pictures...love you, (snap). OK, we held up the phone so you are in the shot too. FUNNY! That's a picture I'll always remember. I'm very thankful for my family and my friends too!

Let's talk about a girl in hell base. She was a very bad girl. She pointed out a very wrong of a medic's performance to a patient and subsequently was yelled at, (because she baby's patients), and now sits in the corner getting her licks, (at another base). Priorities of upper management can be so backwards and especially in a war zone when you don't have resources: remediate the abusive medic- maybe send them to PTSS (post traumatic stress syndrome) counseling, or something in that line. NOOOOO, punish the girl who told! Say that her skills are sub par. Say that she is too friendly.
So she sits being watched at all times. She had a babysitter in the form of a badge that allows you no access to food or showers, wander alone to church or the store or even the laundry mat. And the beat all, make the babysitters many of the people that she works with. How sick can your co-workers get from having to tote you around when they'd rather be home after a hard day's work. I'm thankful that I got my big girl badge yesterday and can go most anywhere that I want by myself!

So she prays for the Lord's strength, endurance, hope, knowledge, peace and she acknowledges all the blessings that have come out of this trial... meeting others like her and co-workers who slip and tell her it will soon end, it's happened to so many others. And she just puts one foot in front of the other day in and day out with the grace of God and forever holding his hand. I can not imagine how non- Christians get through life. Who do they depend on? Who gives them hope? Trials must happen to strengthen us. It rains on the saved and unsaved alike. I know that and I welcome the chance to grow in my Lord always. I am thankful that I believe and am firmly in Christ!

So a story to end my blog is about the poo pond that is getting far too much attention. I even bought the t-shirt. I can't wear it here...that would be disgusting when that's all you can smell at times no matter where you are. I was eating breakfast yesterday and the smell wafted through. That was the end of that meal! Someone actually brought in pictures of a beautiful sunset over the poo pond. It has finally made it to the big times and is now a tourist attraction. It has cute little signs around it such as like Area 51 Poo, Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory, you get the idea. Unfortunately, the last guy who jumped into the poo pond on a dare, died. Put shit together with lots of chemicals that will eat you alive and you get a quick ticket to heaven. And the smell is a constant reminder that everything can kill you here. This is the end of the world. The sign that says, "Welcome to Afghanistan"  should say,"Welcome to hell." I am thankful that even though I work here, I was born in the USA!

So I give thanks along with everyone for another year of life, and always for my freedom, health and love from all and to all.....Happy Thanksgiving!

How much is too much? I snuck a blog 11/24

How much is too much? I wish today's blog was funnier, but war is not funny and this is just one episode.
Nights ago on the tiny FOB-foreign operating base, that I lived on, the military conducted a raid on our camp. No ex-pats were bothered, (Americans, British). I watched as foreign nationals (FN's) shoved their possesions here and there to hide stuff that would be confiscated. Things like laptops, hard drives, cell phones, flash drives, I-pods.Not understanding what was happening, I thought that maybe a spy had gotten on the base. It was with extreme horror that they seemed to focus on the Bosnians and Kenyans on this particular raid. They searched and frisked..I watched in horror and disbelief as my buddies were taken away. The feeling was simular to your drunk and driving friends. They won't let you drive because it's their car and, "hey! I'm not that drunk". They are impervious to death. So, you try to follow them but, sure enough they get pulled over and when the police try to arrest them, you sit helplessly by wanting to run after the cop to defend them pleading..He really is a good guy. I've know him and I can vouch for him...please don't arrest him! Then your buddy pulls a gun and your resolve is shot to hell. So this was how it was. I watched as the US soldiers took one after another of my buddies into custody. After they searched them they were taken to their rooms for a search for prohibited items. I was asked to accompany the bomb sniffing dogs with their masters in the girls compound. I asked them what it was the dogs were searching for? Bombs! They were searching for BOMBS! They can be made with hairspray, strike matches, after shave, ect... I had no idea. It's amazing the crap that can be acquired to kill someone else. And when did Bosnia become the enemy? When did they make the super dangerous to Americans watch list? Am I stupid? Then I watched as the military brough out bags of stuff that I now knew could be used to mutilate me without a thought for my family, friends or children. Or was that harmless stuff used for their everyday comfort? I am suspicious of everyone on a normal day, but even that side swiped me. SO, after everything was over, the Bosnians- my buddies looked at me with disgust because I was one of them- American. Gone were the conversations spoken in English because I was present. I asked if everyone was OK. One guy said, why are you worried, you are American. I said I wasn't worried for myself but for them and then I left gut punched and out of breath.
Today was another day and I'm more liked than ever by them. I should be on a box of Wheatie's according to the Bosnians. Because I worried for them? Gone were the steotypes TCN, FN, AMericans, because I cared for them. WTH? What kind of a world do I live in? Does this make me less suspicious? Actually I go with the crowd that says anything for my safety. But again I will say that the good Lord did not put me here to blow me up. So when is it enough or how much is too much? I'll let you know another time...missile attack and going to the bunkers!