Drinking

My nephew posted on Facebook, "sometimes being the sober one is what is neccessary." Did I miss something? Necessary for what? Since I don't drink anymore what's that mean? Of course there was a time when I did't drink any less, but there was still no one to drive me home, so why bother working on a DUI or a hang over on the 'morrow. Too much to lose.

If you don't drink that makes you the automatic DD (designated driver). I highly suggest charging for this service simply for the gas alone. If you happen upon an address to drop them at... the girl will suddenly want to go with the guy and the smooth talker has by then passed out in the back forgetting to give his address and then they're fighting and the boob jumps from the moving vehicle to go rolling down the road and has passed out on the curb. Decisions- pick him up, (you can't just run him over) or find something for the former beauty queen to vomit in who just ruined your new interior. Sometimes it's not fun being the necessary one.

Did you know that most people that drink to excess believe that non-drinkers are no fun? I ask you, who can draw a better obnoxious picture on a sleeping drunks face, that is clearly identifiable, than a sober someone? You can also paint a guy nails fire engine red without his knowledge, Or make fun of them in the "I love you buddy" pictures. You can also be the good buddy and pick up more beer without a refusal from the store clerk. Sober people do have their place in the world.

We forget all these little tidbits here in the sandbox. There's nightly dreams of "when I get to Dubai". We fly out of country and there is a special Irish Pub at our first stop. They, (not me) hop off the plane and race to get that fresh Bud taste after being parched for so long. Many miss their flights or lose their luggage, but who cares. Priorities and neccessities are what's on their mind.

So I plan on bring the sober one because my mind is on getting home quickly. I scheduled in late July. If I so desired, I can have some cocktails in the comfort of my home. Tony is right! Sometimes being the sober one is what is necessary.

Above is a cute picture of the guys hanging out on Cigar Night sans alcohol

Birthday pictures

The pictures are out of order, but you get the idea. I got to the DFAC so quickly that they were not ready for me. Here's Leo lighting the candles. He's got the most infectious smile!

Here's he's trying to stop me before the candles are lit..very cute!

Surprise!!!!

I celebrated my birthday in a war zone. Who says I don't live it up!

Happy Birthday to me!

I had a chance to celebrate my birthday in the sandbox and I was sick as a dog! I had some painful, killer stomach flu. That's the gift that keeps on giving. It gave me an eyeful of the women's latrine. That's a site I won't miss when I'm gone. All of my boo-hooing, I have to say that everyday is a blessing. I really missed everyone- my family and my friends. On my day I could only take Facebook in small doses because I was so homesick and choked up, especially being sick and all.

I was called to the DFAC (chowhall) for an emergency. I thought for a split second to take the medical bag with me, but I was sick and so tired. We all do a little whine on occasion. So I trudged my germ ridden self there and opened the door to "Surprise, Happy Birthday!" I was shocked and laughed, thanking everyone, but still I didn't get it. I went further in looking for the manager who walked out with a cake. Oh my! I looked down and it had my name on it. I almost cried....geez, I was so verklempt! So sweet. I have only been on this FOB 2 weeks, but I was here in January too and everybody has kept in contact via Facebook. It's truely an amazing friendship that has been built and I appreciate it so much being so far from home.So if you don't get Facebook, here's some swell pictures!

Cool kids!

I'm finding you are who you hang with. I thought I was all done with that in grade school. Remember when...if you hung with the cool kids that automatically made you cool too? It didn't really but...

It's a little different here. My Buddy Viktoria is young and beautiful. She's also a hoot and we are known as trouble #1 and trouble #2. We meet up frequently at Frank's Garden, which is 3 cement walls on a cement slab with a strange little tree that does not provide us shade. I wanted to paint some flowers on the cement, but we only have Army green and battleship gray available. Even I can not be creative with that... um, maybe... We do have some red poppies poking up around the base, but I'm sure replanting them in a pot for the garden would not go over well. Plus I would hate to see them broken off for their drug. Nice guy Frank, (who is the site medic taking a well deserved break from joke telling and general rabble rousing), graciously donated lawn chairs for our comfort. This is our smoking area and it's a nice addition because there really wasn't a central spot to meet up before. When looking for anyone not in their office, it's a good bet they're in Frank's garden.

Viktoria also has me working out. I'm on Day #4 and so sore that I feel as I may never use my arms again. Of course my trainer thinks it's the funniest thing he's ever seen. He speaks very little english. I can call him any name in the book and get away with it, so long as I don't use profanity, because we all know those are the first words learned in any language. He's a good guy that is going to get me fit in record time even if it's going to kill me. He's always prompt and I've learned to be on time if only to avoid extra reps.

So back to the cool kids...I don't know if I'm one, but I know I grew up and found originality and independance. There's so much hate and miserable people in our world. Look at Aesha who's nose and ears were cut off.. believe me, google it. It's no different on these bases where there's "the one" who's torturous to the rest. Do they leave their assignments burping up the brew, making excuses about their life and reliving their glory days with I got even...I made life hell...I 'm mean and bad... Honestly, I can relate. I called myself the company B_ tch for years. And I'm so sorry for that. I found that I like to be happy and surround myself with fun. Now, I think that's cool!

Pictured above is #1 Ashok, #2 Sakata (coolest name ever), Valerie and my buddy Viktoria- enjoy!

The learning curve

Good grief time fly's. I can't believe it's been so many days since I've blogged. It's been pretty busy at Tiny FOB, plus I'm trying to enroll in school. I fiqured since I'm studying daily, I should get some credits out of this.

This week alone I've studied the snakes, rats, bugs from around this area. More specific about their diseases that they spread or their stings and bites and how to treat them. I was asked if I was teaching about snakes and rats...hey? Did I hear an undertone in that question? Sometimes I wish I could be a snake and sneak up behind my enemies spewing my venomous poison, but everything is written on my face...that is unless my mouth is going. I've also been called a hoe...I'm still praying that it was a typo, but you never know here in the sandbox.

I was able to demonstrated bleeding control to a group of my peers because...well, we are in a warzone and I thought that might be a handy trick to know for the non- medically inclined- especially if we are attacked. People just really want to help. All those crane neckers and gawkers would be rescuers if they only knew how. It's all about watch your buddy. So we made some homemade tourniques (teach them how to use what's readily available), and the military was 100% behind my efforts and donated some of theirs. I later saw some of the trainees wearing them as belts. What inguinity! I don't care where I see them, so long as they have them on their person at all times.

Watch out! I just got a new Sports medicine book. All those aches and pain had better be breaks and sprains...I'm raring to go. It comes complete with symptoms, tests, treatments....all the stuff a girl would want to know- YES!!

This has been my dream job in terms of learning and experience...only 4 months left- Yahoo! R&R is coming up soon!

Love & hate

The hating game is as prevalent here as anywhere. I'm at a FOB that I always thought of as all for one, One for all. The cutest tiny FOB in the land. But things change and backs get stabbed and feelings get hurt. It just reminds me that Words said can never be taken back. Now a whole group will suffer for a few and that is a shame.

Pain and sorrow, difficult assignments will always be around us, but isn't that what makes us human? Our ability to cope and do the best we can with what we have. Life gives us lemonade, it's up to us to sweeten it for the good of all. I've been cautioned against talking to enemy V, (for you medical persons or not, we would give the psychiatric people something to calm them and our favorite term was Vitamin V)...enemy V- get it. This person is supposively poison, but if you're reading me, you know that I think everyone is functioning to the best of their ablility. I'm nice to all. Still, I know it's bad when the whole camp talks. Somebody needs a friend. Say a prayer...

My buddy is getting transferred- oh no! I cried a lot. He is one of the most outstanding, upright, kind, thinks of everyone but himself good fellow that I have ever met. He's younger than my son, but when I grow up I want to be just like him. He was not popular among a very few due to his commanding presence, but he was genuine and extremely caring. No one knows yet how much he'll be missed, but I do. I feel sorry for everyone and I fear they will be sorry they chased him off.

Then, the ever present terrorists. I saw on the news how the US foiled a bomb plot on a major airline headed for the States. Will this never end? Day after day threats, fear. How about, if you don't like me please stay on your own side of the street and I'll stay on mine. Case closed.

Speaking of, I'm here far away and my neighbor has her claws outstretched. My next R&R is planned around my next court hearing from her mad attack on my car. She still taunts and harrasses although I'm not there. So OK, court it is. I never pressed changes, but my insurers did, so off I go. This is ridiculous! I will be very happy to see my family and friends, so it's a win for me!

So practice love. We're only on this planet for a short time. I think I'll go and spread some now!

Our daily walks

It's officially hot and I'm cutting my walks down, which I'm proud to say that we do 1 1/2 miles a day. Not that it's far, but we make the time to do it is the point. I may be using the gym where it's cool any day. I hate to exercise until I'm doing it. I hate the time it takes to get ready to go to the gym.... change your clothes & shoes, get water, wait for your buddy or wait for a treadmill. It's much better to grab some water and go walking.

The other day, at about 100 degrees, I'm walking and I noticed that I had downed a bottle and was only a 3rd of the way. My skin is changing colors daily and have a new appreciation for the blond hair that I acquired when I was home. I believe that it is reflecting the sun keeping me cooler like the stylist, (who talked me into it), said. I had it touched up once by the hair shop on the FOB and the girl that did my hair completely dyed the blond highlights out and turned it a really nasty shade of brown. As cheap as I am, all I kept thinking of was how much it had cost for the dye job and she wrecked it. I went and got a box of dye from the PX and immediately dyed it back to blond. So I have roots, do I really care about it here...No!

I have always loved walking because it's the "me" time. It's peace and reflection and a chance to view your surroundings. It's a huge stress reliever for me. My new partner is extremely motivating and prompts me daily to make the time, which I would skip many times just because we have been so busy. We can be reached at all times, but I'm a worry wart. It concerns me about how we'll to get to our patients if they call. You can't de-stress in that fashion, so my buddy is so laid back he manages to ease my mind in seconds by making me laugh. Plus he's a lot faster than me, so he can run ahead if we must...God bless his young soul.

It's toasty warm out and sometimes we can see the countryside which looks incredibly peaceful with the Shepard's out with their little sheep and goat. Who can tell the difference? Not me...born and city bred! So, I bought binoculars to view distances and spotted a lone man watching us. We're not going that way anymore. You never know. This is a war zone after all.

Rules

SO about the sex thing here...I understand a girl came in for an etopic pregnancy. She was rushed for surgery and returned in time for the PID shuffle. (in layman terms, that's code for a nasty vaginal infection). Next, I heard of a sex toy injury...wth? And STD's are on the merry go round and round...I don't understand when no means "OK" until you're caught in the act, then out you go, it's back home baby. It happens...

We are here in support of the military. "No sex" must be worse for them because they are so young with their hormones raging.I won't even go into the private moment noises at night that keep the other guy up all night. The stories around the campfire are hilarious and sometimes disgusting. We know where most of the campers sleeps, so we know who you are! It's like an anywhere neighborhood here. I hate the paper thin walls, but am greatful that most have wall or at least curtains. And never you mind about the stolen moments in the open bay tents. I actually had to tell some girls to get a room...actually, my phrase was, "shut the f_ _ _ up! Never disturb my slumber!

I'm sure the troops have the same problem. I don't know. We only hear of stuff when a contractor is involved. Plus, it's a military rule. They are pretty hard core inforcers. Caught, you are discharged! SO, I don't understand how you can seek an abortion one minute then return to work 6 weeks later as if nothing happened. How did she get pregnant in the first place...immaculant conception? It looks like proof to me that some hanky panky was going about. If rules can be broken, why fire a local worker that was found sneaking food out to his family? OR, fire someone for making a tasteless remark? Or for that matter, fire the guy who habitually wakes up late for work. See what I'm getting at, it would cause mass chaos to break the rules. In a war zone, we need order to get the job done and keep us safe.

I found that I like the rules- the real ones. Not the ones that are made up to give a superior power and belittle the peons. But, real rules that everyone must abide by. And yes, it still ticks me off that I can't sleep late, steal goodies for my room (attracts mice- Ok, I could do without the snacks), or snuggle sometimes. I know what's expected at my FOB and I follow the rules. But, I'm still working on the general in country rules, as they change daily.

It's a Bug's Life

It's warm in the Sandbox, let the bug munchie's commence.

We are getting some not so fun bites out here. I got a very interesting Blistered Beetle rash patient. Cool for me because I was assigned the reading a week or more ago and never got around to it. SO, I took a hour out to just kick back and do some reading and I came upon the assigned topic of these beetles. It was fascinating how they are a soft little tiny bug. In fact 10 or more of them can fit on a penny. They don't bite, but as the victim feels them crawling around, the natural reaction is to swat the buggers. Dead is when they do the damage because their juices are highly toxic to humans and cause a very intense burning deep down in the flesh. The rash resembles scratches with redness surrounding them. Plus if you get the stuff on your hands, everywhere you touch breaks out too. (Use your imagination). A day later the blisters come and more pain. My lucky patient came in the day after the read and soon after he got out of bed...(where we suspect the little beetle was). He came into the clinic in extreme pain carrying his arm. (He was bit in the shoulder and maybe a little dramatic), so I was able to treat him appropriately and the rash was gone in 2 days. The patient was so greatful he followed me around for 3 more. Wish I could have swatted him.

Next, a scorpion bite. Don't know which brand, but it was not the Death Biter. That's the one who is the 4th deadliest critter in the world and we co-habitate with them- yes indeed! It's a colorful guy with a Mountain Dew colored coat, so we keep a look out for that one and it's said to be highly aggressive. The one that bit the patient was bad enough. It bit the victim on the knee cap, so now he has a double cap due to the swelling. He would like Morphine, Demerol or anything to make him sleep. There's no shortage of drug seekers here. He instead received an antihistamine and a little numbing agent. He almost got a swat on the butt for being a pain, but he was begging for one- so no.

And then...I actually took my new partner and a visitor on a FOB walkabout to look for one of my least favorite pest of all time. (What am I saying? I hate them all!) We sought the dreaded Camel Spider. Actually, they aren't too bad right now due to the fact that they're still bitty babies. But, I did have a teenager stalk me yesterday and I kicked it into tomorrow. Disgusting! So if this writing didn't get you itching enough, I also am including pictures!

I once had a Kitty. She was a long haired cat that just hung out and was my buddy. One day the kids called me at work to tell me Kitty was sick. I got dropped off at my house and as I made the long walk up the driveway, I could see her crawling slowly and with her last breaths of air seeking me. I picked my girl up, and she died in my arms.That's the memory that I have of my pet...Beautiful, loved, soft and kind. There's never again been a cat like Kitty. She was one of a kind. I never cared much for cats after that and now I'm highly allergic to them. So that's that.. The cats that they have here in Afghanistan are a wild bunch. We're warned not to pet them because the risk of rabies is so high..#1 in the world. So I'm sitting outdoors watching as this huge mangy ball of fur walking in authority through the base. My cat hating buddy throws a rock at it and it scampers away. Not even 5 minutes later it walks proudly in the middle of the compound carrying a big rat...to be stored under the entertainment tent. 10 minutes later, again I see it walk regally by with another rat. And then a third time this happens...who needs Vector. Did I mention that the forbidden rat catcher had a rhinestone collar on? I really hate rodents so maybe this pet is OK, but I still won't be touching it.Ok, so no petting or killing Garfield. But I went to movie night at the entertainment tent and it had a smell in there. Plus, I'm trying the Atkins Diet and all that meat and the memories of fresh kill is making me gag. Back to Noodle Roni for me in the sandbox.