I am an island

Today I was sitting around with the guys and they were telling some not so PC jokes. I was laughing and one of the guys remarked that it's time for me to go. The place is rubbing off on me. Indeed it is. This was my favorite FOB to be at, but times change and people are constantly moved around. A fact I will never understand.

Check out this analogy, I have a sewing machine. I push down on the foot pedal which directs the needle and bobbin to work in harmony. The thread comes out in tiny increments threading through the material as perfect stitches. The wheel turns round and round to coordiate the parts. It is a well oiled machine and made perfectly for the job. Suppose I step softly on the pedal with tiny baby feet, the machine would not do quite a splended job- if it worked at all. If I jammed on the pedal all parts would work in a jerky fashion with my stitches toppling each other- some hiding while others are on the radar. You keep the person who does the best job with the highest skill level and who can do it with the least amount of effort. Make sense?

A leader should be that. Someone who others go to, is approachable, that they can look up to. A leader should have a voice and frequently use it, but not shout or demean. They should be visible- you can't look to the one you can't see. They make decisions in a calm, concise manner- so as not to panick the masses. They implement methods that are tried and true. They screw up too, but they alone take the blame thereby establishing trust. Lastly, they are resilent, optimistic and empathtic. That's the person I want on my side, the one to follow. Someone who has my back.

Not the one that leaves me stranded on an island with Hitler, Napolean and Baron Munchhausen rolled up in one. That was a recent challenge for me. As medics, many look to us. We're the docs they see. The one to fix all things. We perservere and compete with the challenge. We can muddle on and muddle through. Many things we can't change, but can make it better simply by listening. No matter the problem, we're here to fix the hurt. Even if the hurt is on us.

So the place is rubbing off on me. Gone are the days of putting racist in their place- I'm now a dirty, stupid black, and by golly I have to take it. (SO what I'm Mexican- same thing). I can get pushed around and not push back. Yelled at in front of a early morning meeting with disparing remarks and not defend myself. (Let's never forget how well I do mornings...I'm silly happy). And don't forget the cardinal rule that you follow all rules but HIPPA- I don't think so! Some things I refuse to change and patients do need protection.

So I leave to go back to nice and happy Maria and another place... where I am a rock. I am an island... always on my own.

same,same, but different

Picture: Arian, Viktoria and Me!

God is more interested in changing me than my circumstances. I repeat that day in and day out. I'm up against a brick wall. Somebody is making life hell for everyone. I want to be friendly and try to have others look in a new way at others, but how can I when there's sneaking about and back stabbing abounds? You should never scream harassment then walk around in a bathrobe being the mad flasher. I try to give a heads up about the talk that reflects on us because of the risque behavior, but NOOOO. We all have free will- don't you know! Well- I got flashed and I'm offended. It was an eye full of nothing that I wanted to see. WTH!!!

We're going through an extra protective measure by the buddy system and never go out alone to prevent getting accosted by some pretty desperate pigs. Real men don't need to force anyone- ain't that the truth! Even in the sandbox there's some pretty stupid females that think they are still teenagers. I want to yell out, "Look in the mirror", (very few of those here). Say it with me R-E_S_P_e_c_T. What a joke - but not funny...and it's demeaning to all the females when one puts all in danger. At what age do you grow up? The answer is never, but some play their hand with a little more sense.

I started working out with my young buddy. Her angles are sharp, mine jiggle. I do feel so much healthier and stronger. It's great fun. I realized that I hated to work out around all the kids because I felt they were staring and saying, "look at the fat lady." Ok, maybe true, but there's a whole lot of helpers that want to show you how to tone this and how to work that. The encouragement is contagious. I'm really enjoying the gym for a change.

So how does this change me? First I'm going to the gym and I actually look forward to it. Next, I've learned that people without friends are a sad lot. I refuse to play the mean game. Forget that old saying about... keep your enemies close- who has the time of their life for that? I'm just going to enjoy my life and be nice to everyone. It's really same, same here...but different.

Drinking

My nephew posted on Facebook, "sometimes being the sober one is what is neccessary." Did I miss something? Necessary for what? Since I don't drink anymore what's that mean? Of course there was a time when I did't drink any less, but there was still no one to drive me home, so why bother working on a DUI or a hang over on the 'morrow. Too much to lose.

If you don't drink that makes you the automatic DD (designated driver). I highly suggest charging for this service simply for the gas alone. If you happen upon an address to drop them at... the girl will suddenly want to go with the guy and the smooth talker has by then passed out in the back forgetting to give his address and then they're fighting and the boob jumps from the moving vehicle to go rolling down the road and has passed out on the curb. Decisions- pick him up, (you can't just run him over) or find something for the former beauty queen to vomit in who just ruined your new interior. Sometimes it's not fun being the necessary one.

Did you know that most people that drink to excess believe that non-drinkers are no fun? I ask you, who can draw a better obnoxious picture on a sleeping drunks face, that is clearly identifiable, than a sober someone? You can also paint a guy nails fire engine red without his knowledge, Or make fun of them in the "I love you buddy" pictures. You can also be the good buddy and pick up more beer without a refusal from the store clerk. Sober people do have their place in the world.

We forget all these little tidbits here in the sandbox. There's nightly dreams of "when I get to Dubai". We fly out of country and there is a special Irish Pub at our first stop. They, (not me) hop off the plane and race to get that fresh Bud taste after being parched for so long. Many miss their flights or lose their luggage, but who cares. Priorities and neccessities are what's on their mind.

So I plan on bring the sober one because my mind is on getting home quickly. I scheduled in late July. If I so desired, I can have some cocktails in the comfort of my home. Tony is right! Sometimes being the sober one is what is necessary.

Above is a cute picture of the guys hanging out on Cigar Night sans alcohol

Birthday pictures

The pictures are out of order, but you get the idea. I got to the DFAC so quickly that they were not ready for me. Here's Leo lighting the candles. He's got the most infectious smile!

Here's he's trying to stop me before the candles are lit..very cute!

Surprise!!!!

I celebrated my birthday in a war zone. Who says I don't live it up!

Happy Birthday to me!

I had a chance to celebrate my birthday in the sandbox and I was sick as a dog! I had some painful, killer stomach flu. That's the gift that keeps on giving. It gave me an eyeful of the women's latrine. That's a site I won't miss when I'm gone. All of my boo-hooing, I have to say that everyday is a blessing. I really missed everyone- my family and my friends. On my day I could only take Facebook in small doses because I was so homesick and choked up, especially being sick and all.

I was called to the DFAC (chowhall) for an emergency. I thought for a split second to take the medical bag with me, but I was sick and so tired. We all do a little whine on occasion. So I trudged my germ ridden self there and opened the door to "Surprise, Happy Birthday!" I was shocked and laughed, thanking everyone, but still I didn't get it. I went further in looking for the manager who walked out with a cake. Oh my! I looked down and it had my name on it. I almost cried....geez, I was so verklempt! So sweet. I have only been on this FOB 2 weeks, but I was here in January too and everybody has kept in contact via Facebook. It's truely an amazing friendship that has been built and I appreciate it so much being so far from home.So if you don't get Facebook, here's some swell pictures!

Cool kids!

I'm finding you are who you hang with. I thought I was all done with that in grade school. Remember when...if you hung with the cool kids that automatically made you cool too? It didn't really but...

It's a little different here. My Buddy Viktoria is young and beautiful. She's also a hoot and we are known as trouble #1 and trouble #2. We meet up frequently at Frank's Garden, which is 3 cement walls on a cement slab with a strange little tree that does not provide us shade. I wanted to paint some flowers on the cement, but we only have Army green and battleship gray available. Even I can not be creative with that... um, maybe... We do have some red poppies poking up around the base, but I'm sure replanting them in a pot for the garden would not go over well. Plus I would hate to see them broken off for their drug. Nice guy Frank, (who is the site medic taking a well deserved break from joke telling and general rabble rousing), graciously donated lawn chairs for our comfort. This is our smoking area and it's a nice addition because there really wasn't a central spot to meet up before. When looking for anyone not in their office, it's a good bet they're in Frank's garden.

Viktoria also has me working out. I'm on Day #4 and so sore that I feel as I may never use my arms again. Of course my trainer thinks it's the funniest thing he's ever seen. He speaks very little english. I can call him any name in the book and get away with it, so long as I don't use profanity, because we all know those are the first words learned in any language. He's a good guy that is going to get me fit in record time even if it's going to kill me. He's always prompt and I've learned to be on time if only to avoid extra reps.

So back to the cool kids...I don't know if I'm one, but I know I grew up and found originality and independance. There's so much hate and miserable people in our world. Look at Aesha who's nose and ears were cut off.. believe me, google it. It's no different on these bases where there's "the one" who's torturous to the rest. Do they leave their assignments burping up the brew, making excuses about their life and reliving their glory days with I got even...I made life hell...I 'm mean and bad... Honestly, I can relate. I called myself the company B_ tch for years. And I'm so sorry for that. I found that I like to be happy and surround myself with fun. Now, I think that's cool!

Pictured above is #1 Ashok, #2 Sakata (coolest name ever), Valerie and my buddy Viktoria- enjoy!

The learning curve

Good grief time fly's. I can't believe it's been so many days since I've blogged. It's been pretty busy at Tiny FOB, plus I'm trying to enroll in school. I fiqured since I'm studying daily, I should get some credits out of this.

This week alone I've studied the snakes, rats, bugs from around this area. More specific about their diseases that they spread or their stings and bites and how to treat them. I was asked if I was teaching about snakes and rats...hey? Did I hear an undertone in that question? Sometimes I wish I could be a snake and sneak up behind my enemies spewing my venomous poison, but everything is written on my face...that is unless my mouth is going. I've also been called a hoe...I'm still praying that it was a typo, but you never know here in the sandbox.

I was able to demonstrated bleeding control to a group of my peers because...well, we are in a warzone and I thought that might be a handy trick to know for the non- medically inclined- especially if we are attacked. People just really want to help. All those crane neckers and gawkers would be rescuers if they only knew how. It's all about watch your buddy. So we made some homemade tourniques (teach them how to use what's readily available), and the military was 100% behind my efforts and donated some of theirs. I later saw some of the trainees wearing them as belts. What inguinity! I don't care where I see them, so long as they have them on their person at all times.

Watch out! I just got a new Sports medicine book. All those aches and pain had better be breaks and sprains...I'm raring to go. It comes complete with symptoms, tests, treatments....all the stuff a girl would want to know- YES!!

This has been my dream job in terms of learning and experience...only 4 months left- Yahoo! R&R is coming up soon!