Why can't we get a preview of our life before we live it. That's the question I will be asking God as soon as I cross the pearly gates. If I had known that I would love research and learning new things and be begging to go to class, I would've taken advantage and not screwed around so much. Then again, if I had known how much more fun being a Christian was compared to partying and carousing, I would've done that much sooner too. How is it that non- Christians live each day without having faith or knowing what tomorrow brings? Oh- that's right. They think that nothing will happen to them.
There is a story about a bad guy who, by his own home made weapon that blasted him instead of his intended victims. (Yay!). 2 hours later the good guys recovered him to find this poor sucker laying and bleeding. So they scooped him up and ran to their hospital to provide the needed care. They worked exceptionally hard giving him first aid enroute. At the hospital, he died within 20 minutes. The man had been left in the elements for far too long. Nice buddy's..they had left him behind. Sound familar? Bet he never thought his life would end this way.
So today's lesson was massive bleeding and chest wounds. It was a fascinating lecture with hands on "how to do this and that" for all. My partner and I go to the continuing education classes every day for an hour and I actually asked to please be allowed to attend. I have since found out that we have more experience that the whole class combined, but it's still a great source of new information on the old stuff we knew. A mind is a terrible thing to waste...and I done plenty of wasting in my time.
But the time is now to live life to the fullest. It's funny how the soldiers think about their survival. Some don't come back from their missions and they realize that it could be them at every turn. We think about the people back home and believe that their little dramas are piddlely next to what is experienced here and we can't wait to get back to that. So as I preview the life before me, I find that even in a war zone I can learn and grow and experience life to the fullest! I will enjoy each day that the good Lord gave me! Can I get an Amen!
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Spreadsheets or slow torture for the chatterbox
Today, another treat day on the Excel spreadsheet, only this time I had all of the fun. I found out that I was being moved to another base to cover for my buddy. They only send the highest of trustworthy people to cover this base, because the regular medic is well loved by his people. And the last time he was gone, "SOMEONE" went in and destroyed his hand made, lovingly sanded and highly varnished furniture. Plus, "whoever" was not favored by the people. Since I know a lot of the people there...and it is my buddy, I get to go- Yippee! So, back to paperwork...or rather learning a new trick for me.
I hate spreadsheets! Whoever invented this had to be someone who did not like anyone. It's a truely boring task and there is no way you can talk to anyone or even listen to music because any distraction screws the whole thing up. I learned this first hand as I was inputing data, (I get to talk like a nerd while I'm doing stupid people tricks that I was not made to do). I thought that since all the dates fell in line that I could go up and down and make the next column in a month's date or 6 months, filling the whole row. Short cuts! That's what I'm talking about! Well, my partner and trainer extraordinairre checked my work. All of a sudden he says stop! (Like I have chocolate on my face and hands). He says slowly and exact (like I am holding a grenade with the pin out), to save the spreadsheet and step away. I said, "what????" (a little whiny). He says all the people have their numbers all mixed up and the rows are mixed up...I don't know. It should have worked. So, what he is talking about...I don't know. He fixed the problem and is going to try me again at this- OK? The man is a saint...
I hate spreadsheets! Whoever invented this had to be someone who did not like anyone. It's a truely boring task and there is no way you can talk to anyone or even listen to music because any distraction screws the whole thing up. I learned this first hand as I was inputing data, (I get to talk like a nerd while I'm doing stupid people tricks that I was not made to do). I thought that since all the dates fell in line that I could go up and down and make the next column in a month's date or 6 months, filling the whole row. Short cuts! That's what I'm talking about! Well, my partner and trainer extraordinairre checked my work. All of a sudden he says stop! (Like I have chocolate on my face and hands). He says slowly and exact (like I am holding a grenade with the pin out), to save the spreadsheet and step away. I said, "what????" (a little whiny). He says all the people have their numbers all mixed up and the rows are mixed up...I don't know. It should have worked. So, what he is talking about...I don't know. He fixed the problem and is going to try me again at this- OK? The man is a saint...
Monday, April 2, 2012
Talk, talk, talk
The rumor mill is up and running here in Afghanistan. Since we are on a need to know basis, it's very difficult to know what to believe. You know for certain once you are participating in an action and sometimes even then it's recalled. So I hear we are being moved elsewhere, or a base is being moved here. It depends on who you talk to or what official paper you read. This hill was taken or that town had a demonstration. There's a hit on a Captain, Major, Governor, you name it. This one is getting fired, promoted, moved...oops, that happened. And people actually change their behaviors based on these little tidbits. Maybe we should be our best, do our jobs and stay safe and let tomorrow worry about itself. But that's not as fun!
Someone actually told me, (ME-the medical person), about malaria, food poisoning, and bed bugs that's going around. I think I would be the first to know. Just in case, I literally ran tripping and screaming to the nearest Vector Control buddy to ask. That is the one thing that might make me pack up and run home. The answer was no! No bedbugs. Whew, that was close!
Computer bugs is another thing. Internet is spotty in the best of times. Guesses are thieves inside, spies outside, security all around. Did anyone consider that this really is a war zone and sometimes we have limitations? I just thank my lucky stars for a communication medium that reaches to my family and friends. It really does make living through each and every ground hog day possible. So we live in a contained setting. Few people get outside in the danger zone. You know it's bad when we are the ones that envy that. So people talk about the war and the things the we deal with daily... Dirt, Food, Sleep. It amazes me that no one talks about work here. It might be that it's the only truth...work is all we do. Boo Hoo... contracts end. I can't wait to tell stories about my time here when I'm back home. And that's the truth!
Someone actually told me, (ME-the medical person), about malaria, food poisoning, and bed bugs that's going around. I think I would be the first to know. Just in case, I literally ran tripping and screaming to the nearest Vector Control buddy to ask. That is the one thing that might make me pack up and run home. The answer was no! No bedbugs. Whew, that was close!
Computer bugs is another thing. Internet is spotty in the best of times. Guesses are thieves inside, spies outside, security all around. Did anyone consider that this really is a war zone and sometimes we have limitations? I just thank my lucky stars for a communication medium that reaches to my family and friends. It really does make living through each and every ground hog day possible. So we live in a contained setting. Few people get outside in the danger zone. You know it's bad when we are the ones that envy that. So people talk about the war and the things the we deal with daily... Dirt, Food, Sleep. It amazes me that no one talks about work here. It might be that it's the only truth...work is all we do. Boo Hoo... contracts end. I can't wait to tell stories about my time here when I'm back home. And that's the truth!
Sunday, April 1, 2012
Bugs & Dogs in the sandbox
The bugs are out, yes sirree Bob, it's getting hot in the sandbox! All of that complaining that I did about winter and snow, I had forgotten that there was an upside...no stinkin' bugs. One had the nerve to crawl into bed with me last night. We mistakenly left the air conditioning on and I just about froze overnight. I guess one little creepy crawler did too. It was a huge rolly polly- thank the good Lord that those don't bite because everything (well, almost everything), bites in Afghanistan.
Today was a blast. We went down to watch the dogs getting trained to attack bad guys and the trainers even let the spectators suit up in these Pillsbury dough boy suits. They were directed to run and they would set the dog after them. It was good fun watching the dogs knock down these big beefy kids and gnaw the heck out of them. The trainers would walk over telling Fido what a good boy he was, while he's growling and biting the bedickins out of the pretend assailant. No one screamed like a girl, (which was a little disappointing), but I'm sure it was because all of their buddy's were there. They asked me to suit up..I said politely, "are you crazy?"
Dogs, we are having an influx of coyotes. One got on the base and I heard it said that it was the biggest dog ever seen. So, I went to check it out and asked vector where they were keeping it. Well, they never got it and it was a normal looking mutt. But I was told that they hang around by the garbage dump. Same place where I take my walks...no kidding! Guess I'll be finding another path. Good excuse! I did not need another thing to hamper my workout, but I thank the good Lord and count it as a blessing. I get enough of a workout dodging bugs and rocks and walking in the sandbox.
Today was a blast. We went down to watch the dogs getting trained to attack bad guys and the trainers even let the spectators suit up in these Pillsbury dough boy suits. They were directed to run and they would set the dog after them. It was good fun watching the dogs knock down these big beefy kids and gnaw the heck out of them. The trainers would walk over telling Fido what a good boy he was, while he's growling and biting the bedickins out of the pretend assailant. No one screamed like a girl, (which was a little disappointing), but I'm sure it was because all of their buddy's were there. They asked me to suit up..I said politely, "are you crazy?"
Dogs, we are having an influx of coyotes. One got on the base and I heard it said that it was the biggest dog ever seen. So, I went to check it out and asked vector where they were keeping it. Well, they never got it and it was a normal looking mutt. But I was told that they hang around by the garbage dump. Same place where I take my walks...no kidding! Guess I'll be finding another path. Good excuse! I did not need another thing to hamper my workout, but I thank the good Lord and count it as a blessing. I get enough of a workout dodging bugs and rocks and walking in the sandbox.
Friday, March 30, 2012
Night time
Night time, quiet time in the sandbox...are you kidding me? I went for a little "me time" to the latrines at about 11 pm and you'd think there was a party going on. A simple 5 minute trip took a half an hour by the time my buddy's got finished chatting it up with me. I don't talk much -Yuk, yuk!...and it's pitch black out there. My night vision has returned, but just in case for the real blackout nights I'm still carrying around my gifted flashlight from my buddy Nette.
Light is a big deal here. I've requested an outdoor light so that my patient's can stop stumbling up to our doorstep at all hours of the night. It just kills me when they come for..say... woke up vomiting...and by the way, I hurt my ankle trying to find your door. I just give them a bucket, put them on the stretcher and tell them to hike up their leg and expose it. Visual here...you have got to picture the dumbfounded look on their face! We only work for 12 hours a day...Ha!Ha!...(I crack myself up sometimes!) My bunkroom is in the clinic, so my patient's have the added benefit of 24 hour access to me.
Darkness, the neighbor next door had a very late night and went beddie-bye without even thinking about his poor little medic buddy next door. He did not leave a light on tonight. So not only can't my patients find the door (if they so desire), it also sucked big time for me, because it illuminated the port-a-potty nearby for the mignight nature call. So, will have to tramp down to the real latrines when nature calls... decisions.
Nature and night time, quiet time. Time for scorpions and spiders and all other creepy crawlers to come out and hunt for my leg. That's what it feels like. Today I took the scenic walk around the place and we climbed a hill where there were tons of little camel spiders. They're ok when they're the size of a couple of ants, it's when they get bigger like the size of my hand. They walk on hind legs with their little pinchers arms posed for you and they are fast! We stomped around trying to smash them and they were mostly able to avoid certain death.
Day or night, something is always happening around here. It makes for an interesting adventure and I know I will eventually leave the sandbox and return home...or maybe to a new adventure! Stay tuned...
Light is a big deal here. I've requested an outdoor light so that my patient's can stop stumbling up to our doorstep at all hours of the night. It just kills me when they come for..say... woke up vomiting...and by the way, I hurt my ankle trying to find your door. I just give them a bucket, put them on the stretcher and tell them to hike up their leg and expose it. Visual here...you have got to picture the dumbfounded look on their face! We only work for 12 hours a day...Ha!Ha!...(I crack myself up sometimes!) My bunkroom is in the clinic, so my patient's have the added benefit of 24 hour access to me.
Darkness, the neighbor next door had a very late night and went beddie-bye without even thinking about his poor little medic buddy next door. He did not leave a light on tonight. So not only can't my patients find the door (if they so desire), it also sucked big time for me, because it illuminated the port-a-potty nearby for the mignight nature call. So, will have to tramp down to the real latrines when nature calls... decisions.
Nature and night time, quiet time. Time for scorpions and spiders and all other creepy crawlers to come out and hunt for my leg. That's what it feels like. Today I took the scenic walk around the place and we climbed a hill where there were tons of little camel spiders. They're ok when they're the size of a couple of ants, it's when they get bigger like the size of my hand. They walk on hind legs with their little pinchers arms posed for you and they are fast! We stomped around trying to smash them and they were mostly able to avoid certain death.
Day or night, something is always happening around here. It makes for an interesting adventure and I know I will eventually leave the sandbox and return home...or maybe to a new adventure! Stay tuned...
Rain days
Geezzzz, when it rains, it pours. I was thinking of hitting the hay early tonight and checking out the new movie I just bought, "Act of Valor"...stupid thought. I should just run around knocking my head on wood...here comes the rain. The refrigerator broke with thousands of buck-a-roos of drugs. Thankfully, we caught it before the temperature dropped reducing all to rubble. I was able to find enough refrigeration elsewhere so that the stuff wouldn't go bad. So, while we're fumbling around stashing the drugs in coolers and getting rid of the drugs- temporarily that is... and trying to submit very important! must do! right now! this second! for the head office paperwork..and then the repair guys walk in causing more commotion... and a very official inspector type person (banging on the door) demands something for a headache- who also refuses to be seen, (sorry- ever heard of the PX?)... in walks a young guy that doesn't feel well. Poor fellow, (so sorry, I don't feel well either). Quick exam by my partner and when I heard the ominous words, " can you check this out?" I knew no bedtime for us tonight! Sure enough! Who ever heard of a 20 something having a cardiac event bad enough to get him flown out in an all exciting Medavac. We have! Seriously, I don't want to go that way, but it looks so exciting on MASH, (my all time favorite show). We have it all in Afghanistan. So if you're looking for excitement and don't mind waking up to stare death square in the face- come on over! It beats EMS anyday, (except for Detroit where you get shot at daily for pennies).
Speaking of death, it's mouse season here in the sandbox. Springtime and sandstorm time where all critters human or what not, who like to mozy on out and stretch their legs and enjoy the day. I am fortunate enough to have the best in vector control just down the pathway from my hut. They are doing such a great job that those pesky rodents are hiding under my hut and dying. Please someone tell me why they only die after dark and when I'm comfy in my bed? It's a digusting smell and one that I'm sure will forever stay lounged in my sensory brain complete with the alltime awlful smell of the Poo Pond. I'll have to wait for the real rain to wash it all away. Hey! I think we got jipped... (correct slang spelling for cheated as I am attempting to be PC. Did you know that G-Y-P-P-E-D is a racial slur against gypsies? Never can be too sure when the Profiling Police will be around. And as I run on... I'd like to take a pass on the rain too!) Literally, everything washes away here and floods and it's a mess. I'm glad I've missed the worse of it. So goes it- stay away rain! I'll just end here as it is a bright, cloudless, sunny day and it's time to enjoy it!
Speaking of death, it's mouse season here in the sandbox. Springtime and sandstorm time where all critters human or what not, who like to mozy on out and stretch their legs and enjoy the day. I am fortunate enough to have the best in vector control just down the pathway from my hut. They are doing such a great job that those pesky rodents are hiding under my hut and dying. Please someone tell me why they only die after dark and when I'm comfy in my bed? It's a digusting smell and one that I'm sure will forever stay lounged in my sensory brain complete with the alltime awlful smell of the Poo Pond. I'll have to wait for the real rain to wash it all away. Hey! I think we got jipped... (correct slang spelling for cheated as I am attempting to be PC. Did you know that G-Y-P-P-E-D is a racial slur against gypsies? Never can be too sure when the Profiling Police will be around. And as I run on... I'd like to take a pass on the rain too!) Literally, everything washes away here and floods and it's a mess. I'm glad I've missed the worse of it. So goes it- stay away rain! I'll just end here as it is a bright, cloudless, sunny day and it's time to enjoy it!
Thursday, March 29, 2012
Adventures
So I forgot to write about my amazing travel back to the sandbox. I wanted to see as many things as I could while I'm away and on this side of the world. So, I scheduled a layover tour in Amsterdam. I planned for months: cheese factory, boat trip down the river- recommended so that you can see all the sights in one quick hour and if time permitted, a quick jaunt to Anne Franks house. I studied the maps so I wouldn't get lost in the airport or out and about. This was going to be a trip of a lifetime and the best use of my 7 hour layover. So I boarded my plane from Detroit to Amsterdam. I got my favorite window seat and as luck would have it my neighbor was a contractor like me. Surely he knew the importance of sleep to re-adjust when going back to hell. Nope, he did not or didn't care. It was party time! He ordered a beer and asked politely, would you like one. I said no thank you. I don't drink. He said, it might make you sleepy. Well that was enough for me. I said sure- just one. Then we started chatting it up and he sure was funny. The flight attendant came strolling through with her cart and he ordered 2 more. I looked at this harmless beverage and thought, why not. I'm going back to a dry country. Another with dinner and I felt the need to doze...which I did...until I was rudely poked awaked by the knuckle head that stated, "sorry mame, I think you might have fallen asleep, I was just saying..."
Strangely enough, by the time I got to Amsterdam not only was I too tired to walk, I was also a little more than tipsy. Still I made my way with my foggy brain to the travel desk where my adventure awaited...only to be told that they overbooked and they could not accomodate me until 2 hours before my next flight. Thank the heavens for alcohol because I would have been hopping mad. Instead, with profuse apologetics they offered me the only other thing that would make up for this- a bed. Or rather a real nice lounge chair that I quickly fell asleep in for 2 hours before some screaming kids woke me- brats!
My next flight to Dubai, I must have gotten the brother because he talked every bit of the 7 hour flight...I skipped the free booze! Then we landed in Dubai (which I am not fond of anyways. Too glizy and dirty and not women friendly) and promptly got lost for 2 hours in the airport. Not good for a 3 hour layover. When I found my way, alast...friends! People that I knew from most of the bases that I've been to. It was great to get reaquainted along with a great Doc that I've worked with. There was no sleeping on that trip either.So my arrival back to KAF saw me dragging my feet, and a welcome complete with a missile attack. I can definitely say that this has been an adventure that I will always remember!
Strangely enough, by the time I got to Amsterdam not only was I too tired to walk, I was also a little more than tipsy. Still I made my way with my foggy brain to the travel desk where my adventure awaited...only to be told that they overbooked and they could not accomodate me until 2 hours before my next flight. Thank the heavens for alcohol because I would have been hopping mad. Instead, with profuse apologetics they offered me the only other thing that would make up for this- a bed. Or rather a real nice lounge chair that I quickly fell asleep in for 2 hours before some screaming kids woke me- brats!
My next flight to Dubai, I must have gotten the brother because he talked every bit of the 7 hour flight...I skipped the free booze! Then we landed in Dubai (which I am not fond of anyways. Too glizy and dirty and not women friendly) and promptly got lost for 2 hours in the airport. Not good for a 3 hour layover. When I found my way, alast...friends! People that I knew from most of the bases that I've been to. It was great to get reaquainted along with a great Doc that I've worked with. There was no sleeping on that trip either.So my arrival back to KAF saw me dragging my feet, and a welcome complete with a missile attack. I can definitely say that this has been an adventure that I will always remember!
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